


Tears in Heaven

by Skies_of_Red



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel and Dean Winchester Need to Use Their Words, Castiel and Dean Winchester Reunion in Heaven, Castiel is Not Okay (Supernatural), Dean Winchester Deserves Better, Episode Fix-It: s15e20 Carry On, Hurt Dean Winchester, Love Confessions, M/M, There will be universe hopping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-11
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-15 19:48:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28694187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skies_of_Red/pseuds/Skies_of_Red
Summary: Dean in in Heaven, but he's not alright.what the heck is this ending?this can't be it??Cas and Dean know thatlet me try to fix and explain this disaster
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

So…

This is Heaven…

A little stunned but smiling Dean left Bobby at the porch and walked over to his Car.

"Hey there Baby"

He drove off, where to didn't matter, he had nowhere to be after all.

After what might have been a days long drive he stopped.

He just sat there, Babys engine still running.

His mind was blank, was this really the end?

After all the chaos that made up his life, it was too quiet.

This was Heaven, he should be at peace, why does it all feel wrong?

With shaking hands he switched off the engine

it wasn't quiet anymore,

there was silence

nothing

empty

He got out?

Cas helped?

He's alive?

In Heavens silence Dean could hear his tears drip on the leather.

"Cas... why didn't you tell me? All this time? I died thinking you're dead, THAT YOU DIED FOR ME!"

Dean screamed, somewhat dull pain shot through his knuckles as he punched the steering wheel.

It was wrong, everything was wrong

another punch, again, again

There was no air, he couldn't breathe, Baby was suffocating him.

Full of rage and pain and confusion he squeezed out of the car.

"CASTIEL! SHOW YOURSELF!"

He almost missed the flutter of air, turned around to spot the familiar trenchcoat wearing figure standing there and started to smash Castiels face in.

Now there was the pain he'd been missing, with each hit his wrists threatened to break.

Maybe they did break, he couldn't be sure.

His arms were on fire, yet he couldn't stop.

He was still thrashing but he couldn't move anymore.

All the hurt seeping from his limbs into his chest as he realised Castiel was hugging him close.

Cas was crying, tears staining the Hunters jacket.

"Dean... Dean, I love you, please... please, stop hurting yourself..."

Dean cried as if a dam had burst, for the first time in his life he just let go and clung to his angel.

"I'm not, Cas... I'm hurting YOU...I... Castiel... I love you too, I LOVE you"

In simpler times Dean had secretly wondered, what it would be like.

Telling Cas how he'd felt for him.

Maybe even fantasising about his affections being returned, kissing him for the first time.

It was never in fact, this bitter.

\------

After what felt like eternity and still way too soon they moved away from each other.

With a bitter smile they looked at each other

"I'm sorry Dean, I'm so sorry i wasn't there"

"Why weren't you?"

Dean sighed and took the Angels Hand in his.

Cas looked confused and mumbled

"To be honest... I don't know.."

"You don't know?? what the hell cas...?"

"Please! Dean! Let me explain..."

Dean clenched his teeth in anger but nodded

"I honestly don't know why I didn't come to you the moment jack got me out of the empty, it was like I didn't even consider the possibility... there must be something wrong with... I know I know! Dean please don't look at me like that"

Cas looked away, he couldn't stand the look at deans face.

"So you were... like when Naomi messed with you? you were like... compromised?"

"You have to believe me, if I had the choice i'd always be at your side... I always..."

the ground started to shake as Castiels grace raged

"What sorry excuse for an Angel am I... Why didn't I save you... why... Jack told me we were free... why didn't I... this can't be!?"

"CAS! Calm down! You're exploding Heaven!"

"Thats... Not how Heaven works..."

the Angel whispered as he swallowed his anger

"We'll figure this out sunshine... like we always do..."

"together..."

"that's right Cas, together!"


	2. BOO!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team Free Will 3.0 !

Together was easy to assemble.

Jack, or should we say God 2.0, wasn't hard to reach and he also saw that what had happened was weird.

He wouldn't have Dean die that way...

Jack saw him die and he didn't step in... why?

Something wasn't right... on a cosmic level

And so they went on a final hunt to set things right.

God, an Angel and a dead guy, passing Heavens doors to finish their business on earth.

Sam was nursing a beer in the bunkers kitchen as Jack and Castiel appeared.

"CA... CAS??? Is that you?"

Jack gave an assuring nod before Sam hugged Castiel

"Its so good to see you! How did you get out of the Empty? Was that you Jack?"

Jack grinned as Sam praised him.

"Sit! And tell me everything!"

With manic energy Sam handed them coffee and cocoa.

Castiel accepted his cup with a polite smile and started to explain

"So, after you defeated God, as Jack recounted for me, he managed to get me out of the Empty and rebuild Heaven to some extend. However, we've come to notice that there is... a bug... as you would call it, in the system. Choices have been made that, under normal circumstances wouldn't have been made. That's why we are here, You, Dean, Jack and me still have to fix this."

Sams smile faded at that

"uhm, Cas... Dean is... I don't know how to say this... on a hunt, he... He's gone"

"OH, No no, Dean is right here"

Jack exclaimed pointing to the empty seat to his right.

"what..."

calmly sipping his coffee the Angel said

"At the moment Dean isn't corporal, but I assure you he's here, trying and failing to steal your beer, whining"

Cas stared at the seemingly empty space, looking annoyed.

Castiels eye-roll convinced him of Deans presence.

With a baffled and relieved laugh Sam shoved the bottle towards his invisible brother.

"Good to... not see you I guess, I missed you"

"He says 'me too you sap' and wants to know what you've been up to"

a mischievous spark shined in Sams eyes

"Well... same old, trying to sort some stuff in the archives, helping out hunters in need, selling the Impala on eBay..."

Apparently, judging by the exploding Beer bottle and the flickering lights, Dean was not amused.

\----

Researching when you don't know what to research wasn't new to the Winchesters.

Cas flipping pages for a ghost was a little strange but Sam had seen weirder.

To no-ones surprise they came up with nothing...

and Sam, being the only mortal, finally excused himself to get some sleep.

Even in death I'm stuck with boring research, Dean mused.

He stood up to stretch his not at all aching spine,

ghost-hood had its perks.

His body never hurt, he was neither sleepy nor hungry, could zap from place to place, run trough walls...

Ha! Got to try that!

Steeling himself he got into a running position.

You're a Ghost, you can do this!

One... Two...

"Dean?"

TREE!

At top speed he raced towards the wall, jumping and reflexively blinking his eyes shut and

...totally smashed against the wall.

"NNNGH!"

...body never hurt my ass

"For your information, the Men of Letters had the bunker painted with salt, it's ghost proof"

"Thanks Cas...really appreciate it honey..."


	3. is there anybody out there?

A week had passed since and they still had nothing.

Dean started to get the hang of simple Ghost moves, he was able to move small objects and used this new found power to disappear Sams Shampoos and Hair brushes.

He even convinced Jack to dip a white bedsheet in salty water and draping it over him,

like a ghost costume.

Scared the hell out of Sammy.

Not sleeping was a new experience... too much time on his hands.

With Jack he'd explored all the little paths and hidden rooms the bunker had to offer.

Some of the things they'd found he'd rather forget but all in all it had been fun.

Most evenings he spent rolled up next to Cas on the couch, it's not like Sam could see, so he could allow himself some schmaltzy cuddle time.

Cas seemed to understand his insecurities and only brushed his hand through Deans Hair when Sam wasn't looking.

He was happy, truly.

Why didn't he make a move sooner?

Why...

always the why...

"Cas"

"Jes, Dean?"

lying on his lap he met the Angels gaze

"when did you realise.. that you love me"

Cas took a moment to respond

"It was the moment you told me some things are worth dying for... when did you realise?"

Dean took his hand and kissed his knuckles

"Back when Zachariah zapped me to that alternate future. When I saw my future self look at future you..."

"And what kept you from telling me?"

"That's the question, alright. WHY? I know I wanted to..."

"Maybe it was Chucks doing"

"yeah...maybe at first. But that wouldn't explain things messing with our actions after Jack took over, maybe there's more out there than we know"

"You're speculating about the existence of another cosmic entity that's been forcing our will?

Dean sighed

"Doesn't sound fun when you say it like that but yes..."

later they asked Jack and Sam what they thought about their theory, but the kid was totally convinced he'd know if such being existed.

"Cas, Dean, I know I'm pretty new at being God but I can sense things now... things you wouldn't be able to ever understand, even you Castiel. In this universe theres nothing else out there"

"This universe? Are there any others left after Chucks rampage?"

"there may be... maybe not"

"Is there a way we could check?"

Sam cleared his throat and pointed to the libraries geoscope

"We do happen to have an inter-dimensional geoscope, remember?"

With a little God power the thing was ready to use and they took turns trying to spot something.

They'd almost given up when Sam said "Oh...Wow... Dean, remember that us-as-a-TV-show-Universe? It's still there."

**Author's Note:**

> hey you lovely person reading my horrible writing!  
> message me and we can "fangirl" about things ^u^
> 
> what should i write for the next chapters? I have the main story planned out but would love to have someone elses opinion!
> 
> have a good one!


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